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gender non-conformance versus transgenderism

Gender non-conformity is not the same as being transgender with the main distinction being that not all gender variant people experience gender dysphoria.

The other day I was watching a video of a makeup artist being interviewed. That person identified as gay male who cross-dressed virtually full time yet in no way did they even partially identify as a female. They simply chalked up their choice of garb as a preference rather than as an expression of a core female identity. Interestingly, they could have easily been mistaken for a very passable middle-aged transgender woman.

You can see how these two things could cause confusion among civilians.

Perhaps gender non-conformity in absence of dysphoria can be thought of as the flexing of gender norms in order to achieve individuality. Whereas the transgender person can accept or struggle against their nature but it cannot fundamentally be altered.

I am now certain that Harry Benjamin’s hypothesis of varying gender dysphoria intensity in i…
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Jenner learns

Caitlyn Jenner had a steep learning curve but she has improved.

When she first came out there was a kind of obtuseness present borne out of living your life in a bubble. Yes she had been deeply dysphoric all of her life and finally took the steps required to live authentically but she couldn't relate to people who were far less fortunate. Before coming out she had never even met another transgender person.

Still she faced her own detractors and the offensive bile thrown her way on social media was impressive and pulled no punches. The paparazzi followed her every move and they mocked as they took photos. In the end whether you live in the public eye or in private, the life of a trans person is not easy.

I think you will agree as you watch this brief exchange with Seth Meyers that she has come a long way in the last two years and whatever advocacy she can muster can only help to bring attention to the plight of those in our community who are not quite so fortunate.

Jenner shows us …

tangible

Since I am alone when out as Joanna most of the time, I tend to be chatty with people.

I don’t start out looking to talk to just anyone but sometimes a small comment will turn into an exchange and then suddenly blossom into a discussion; and so it was with Michelle this week who is a friendly 66-year-old separated woman living alone in the downtown core.

There we were at the sugar and milk stand dressing our coffees when we struck up a conversation and ended up sitting at the same table.

Michelle lives with her dog and a cat and by her own admission she doesn’t get out much. So after we had finished our coffees she asked if I would like to do this again. So we ended up exchanging numbers and promised that one would eventually call the other.

By the questions she asked and comments she made, Michelle doesn’t know that I am transgender and I am not in any hurry to divulge it. It doesn’t matter because we are two people who may or may not overlap more than a few times and I will cross t…

Marni

Marni Panas grew up in a practicing Catholic household so her upbringing was filled with doubt and guilt regarding her gender issues. In that regard I can strongly relate to her personal struggle.

In this article she says:

“You know from an early age if someone were to find out it would be awful. You get good at keeping a secret. You get good at being alone.” At 25 and still living as a man, she met her future wife, Laurina. About a month into their relationship, Panas told Laurina her truth. “Anyone would be lucky in life to have a partner who makes you believe you can be better, makes you believe you can do more. Laurina has been that gift to me all along.”

That her marriage has managed to survive against the odds is an amazing thing which cannot be downplayed.

I have seen Marni on YouTube videos for transgender causes and being interviewed alone and she is charming, confident and a strong and public advocate for transgender rights in deeply conservative Alberta....

http://www.edmonto…

once the dust settles....

Many people are still confused by what it means to be transgender and I can understand why even we at times grapple with its definition.

In the hunger for media stories with human interest it is often the extremes that draw the most attention. That 53 year old man who left his family to live as a 6 year old girl was one and the byline underscoring it should have been about mental illness. You can find such people all over society without the gender confusion thrown in except those who seek to invalidate the transgender experience will find solace in these cases. Walt Heyer is another less jarring example which is often trotted out by would-be detractors as the man who was cured of his mental illness by finding religion.

Despite the naysayers, the public is far more accepting than ever and, in this new environment, some kids will be hurried along the conveyor belt of transition and put on puberty blockers by well-meaning parents who want to help their children be happy. That they may b…

scientists or rational thought need not apply

Conservatism in the United States has hitched its wagon to two things: religious fundamentalism and unbridled free market capitalism; both of which conspire against what science is trying to do in this world.

The first belief hinges on literal creationism spelled out in the Biblical story and hence leaves many things in the hands of a benevolent or vengeful God. Some of these conservatives are evangelicals who believe in things like the rapture.

The second dogma is based on open markets where the realities of climate change will not be allowed to deter the amassing of profits. Hence they will simply block their ears when scientists warn of a warming planet thanks to our addiction to fossil fuels.

The current sitting American president is not only a moron but is also highly volatile and can change political stances like a weather vane. What drives him is profound immaturity coupled with an almost psychopathic zeal to appear competent and powerful; which is precisely the reverse of real…

coming out to her dad

My father died 22 years ago so this unveiling would never take place.

The emotions are sometimes very raw here as Jae Noel comes out to her own father and he does his best to process something he doesn't at all comprehend. But this old school gentleman will probably come around in the end and I can relate to how difficult it must be to see the person he thought was his son transition.

To help her through this, Jae is fortunate to have a supportive girlfriend who is clearly going to stand by her through all of it.

That this young transgender woman is gynephilic would not compute for the Blanchardians still stuck in the world of 30 years ago and today their heads must be exploding trying to rationalize it.

But then young Jae would not have come out back then and, like the many of us did, likely would have repressed everything for abject fear of rejection.