Skip to main content

healing up and misc...

I can feel things getting better by the day. There will be little bumps coming for sure but it's all going in the right direction. For one thing my kids are more at home when they're staying with me. Before there was a certain discomfort due to the fact that my gf was not all that welcoming towards them and was in particular not a fan of my daughter. This was something I had a lot of difficulty with since I was trying to love her along with my children. But it seemed to be a type of competition for affection and it was not being driven by my children.

On a completely different note I was watching a video of Paolo ballesteros dancing in drag and it made me wonder whether he is not TG. I know he denies being gay (isn't that always the public assumption when you do more than one role in drag?) and he is just so naturally good as a woman that there has to be something there. Would not surprise me in the least if he comes out as transgender at some point. What I like about these stories is that we get to have more public role models who break more barriers and just normalize everything for the rest of us. If Paolo enjoys wearing dresses and doing drag roles but isn't gay, it will just show people that not only drag queens own the domain of cross gender performance. Being a hybrid myself I welcome more stories like these in the future.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

"Oh please its 2016!"

I have mentioned before that I have a lovely young couple living above the unit next to mine. Well the other day as I was getting in the door, she and I overlapped for the first time with me dressed as a woman.

We had a nice conversation and at some point I mentioned the obvious which was that I had told her future husband that they might see me in a different guise from time to time so they wouldn't wonder about who the strange woman was. She just looked at me almost rolling her eyes while smiling from ear to ear and said:

"Oh Please it's 2016!"

For the record she was also very complementary regarding my choice of attire.

I could care less at this point in my life what people think but it is still lovely to see the millennial generation's freedom of spirit and acceptance so lacking in previous generations. Yes they have their own foibles, as does every generation, but this area certainly isn't one of them.

the pseudoscience behind gender dysphoria

The real science as to what causes gender dysphoria still awaits.

Harry Benjamin was on to something except he didn’t have the scientific evidence to back up his suspicions hence, like a true scientist, he negated to draw conclusions. His hunch, based on treating so many patients over his lifetime, was that one is born with a predisposition to be gender dysphoric.

However, with inconclusive brain scans and no DNA marker (as of yet) we are left with believing the word of people who need help and only want to lead happy and productive lives.

The best we have been able to muster since Benjamin's death in 1986 was to amass statistics on who gets a boner imagining themselves as a woman which is in equal parts pathetic and disappointing. For this is not really science at all but is instead playing with interview data that doesn't point to anything definitive or conclusive. I have dealt with this problem at great length in my blog.

The whole thing started with Kurt Freund's obses…

looking past cross gender arousal

Jack’s latest Crossdreamers post got me thinking about cross gender arousal and how it could be avoided; also whether it even matters. This with particular focus on the inability to relate of someone on the outside looking in.

You see, sexuality is a very complicated thing to begin with and when you then add gender identity ambiguity it becomes a recipe to really confuse someone.

So imagine that you are a little boy who identifies as a girl but then along comes puberty and short circuits everything by having the sex you identify with also be the sex you are attracted to. For in essence this is what happens to all all male to female gender dysphoric trans persons who are attracted to women.

So I ask myself: can I imagine a scenario where this inherent contradiction would not produce sexual confusion? The answer is that I cannot.

I am in the unique position, like many of you, to have experienced an early identification with the feminine become sexualized later on. This brought confusion…