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more randomness

I know I repeat myself a lot in this blog. It's like annotation for my psyche and I jot things down when they occur to me. In fact most of this blog is written on a smart phone. I'll be in a coffee house and things will occur to me and I'll need to formalize them in writing. It's my therapy.

So to again recapitulate:

1) I feel increasingly like a woman
2) I am not a fetishistic transvestite
3) I can pass for a woman in public and could work as one if I desired
4) surgery won't make me more of a woman

These 4 points are the main discoveries I have made over the last months. The last one being the most recent discovery and the one which will allow me the flexibility of not requiring a major life overhaul as well as sparing my children much pain. In other words I can live happily as a woman without surgery. Might there be hormones in my future? Possibly but in the short run no. I still need to function as a male in society and I don't want to make that increasingly impossible.

So there - she repeats herself once again.


  1. Joanna, I just found your blog and I am looking forward to reading through it more. Looks like it is intelligently written. I agree with your 4 points as I have discovered them through the years. The main one is how I was dressing up for thrills as a teen -- fetish transvestite I guess but more like confusion! -- and how it evolved into something that I thought was normal for me because of the female feelings inside.

  2. Hi Stevie. I started very young (3 or 4) but discouraged by my mother. Its taken me this long to begin to figure things out. Almost 50 now...


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