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the way forward....

Today I meet the gender therapist and, depending on how the discussion proceeds, I may embark on a 2 year journey to find gender congruence. There is a cost for this because while Quebec pays for surgery, the treatments preceeding SRS are not covered by the health system.

However, my aim is to come to a point where the disphoria is more manageable. That could imply living full time with limited hormone usage and no need not proceed any further. I am hoping this is a worst case scenario so that I can continue to play a male role in the life of my son who incidentally is having strabismus surgery this coming Friday to correct a slight misalignment of his eyes.
He is my primary concern in my gender struggles. He is sensitive and has already displayed discomfort at the idea of my crossdressing. I had not intended to divulge anything at this stage in his life, but my well meaning ex-gf urged me into candor in front of both my children. In some ways I dont regret their exposure to this issue but I also now know their comfort level: dad dresses but we dont want to see it. This is highly acceptable to me in fact. However in discussing trans issues one day upon seeing a program on television, they let me know that they would be extremely perturbed were I ever to consider SRS.

So I am left with a delicate balance to follow. And should there be medication required, my understanding of hormones is that besides limited breast development, softening of the skin and some body hair reduction, there are not drastic changes in the physical sense especially if a small dosage is administered. So while this is a scenario I do not favor, I am preparing for that possibility to arise but only if it helps still my disphoria.

Conversely there is the status quo of living part time in female mode and adapting to that. This is my preferred option but it requires tweaking. The therapy will maybe serve a purpose in this scenario as well.

Work is also an important consideration and thus I have decided to have a preliminary confidential discussion with the head of HR to guage their reaction. I am limiting this discussion to the head of the department who is someone I have known for 10
years and trust.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Anne at this point I would love to get rid of it all. I told the therapist that today....I know it won't at this point though

  3. But I do have a choice however stopping the dressing does not seem to be among them. Any ideas?


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