On another note, my ex gf came back to me and apologized for telling me to leave her alone. I don't really know where we stand now but I will let the course of time take care of that. Whatever is meant to be will be.
and changing gears yet again, my sister who has always tried to talk me out of crossdressing has finally begun to read and understand about GID and autogynephelia. I pointed her to a few places including Jack molay's latest posting on crossdreamers where he talks about whether there is a cure for this enigmatic condition. It is finally starting to sink in with her that this is not something one chooses but lives with and manages. I am starting to feel good about where I am these days with my management of my autogynephelia even if things are hardly perfect. After all nothing in life ever is so I will accept where I am and deal with the changes (if any) as they come.