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pride

Something I have failed to do truly completely is to fully embrace myself for who I am. Dressing up in women’s clothes for me has always been something to feel ashamed of. Even now there are still vestiges of feeling like I am failing at being a man every time I don that dress. It’s hard to remove something so completely engrained in your psyche. I suppose I understand now why there is such a thing as gay pride parades – heterosexuals don’t celebrate their normalcy because they have never had to struggle for self acceptance. I am still not quite where I need to be but I am so much closer to the end of the struggle than near the beginning. Emulating a female is not something to feel embarrassed about because there is nothing wrong with being a female. It is not showing weakness but strength to go out in public in a dress and face the world and I need to repeat that to myself every time I go out.

I stepped out yesterday and had a perfectly lovely time while fully embracing what I was doing. It was a far cry when I could feel myself cringing with the odd disparaging look from a passerby.

Comments

  1. Joanna -

    Isn't it really nice to be able to go outside and have a perfectly lovely time as a female? Do you have the same problem as I do, that opening your mouth spoiled the illusion you work so hard to present?

    Embracing this side does take the edge off, and is quite relaxing, isn't it?

    Marian

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  2. No marian. I spent 4 months working on my voice. I recorded my voice into my cell phone and then listened back until I got it. Keep the voice away from the chest. Pinch your vocal chords without sounding like mickey mouse. Its like the low end of falsetto if that makes sense. Plenty of guidance on youtube for this. Have fun!!

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  3. Oh and yes....expressing this other side is amazing!!

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