Skip to main content

another blog I like

I found a new blog yesterday that really touched me. I think it’s because it’s written by a person who expresses herself in ways I can really relate to. Her name is Charlotte and she is struggling to find peace and balance while living with her gender disphoria. Like me she is divorced and has two children that she loves.

http://lottiesjournal.blogspot.ca/

Charlotte sounds like a lovely person and I very much like the way she writes. It’s written in a very self effacing prose that really shows who she is underneath.

She has (as most of us do) a coloured history of malfunctioning relationships as she tries to reconcile her sense of identity with an attempt to form bonds with females who cannot cope with people like us. It’s simultaneously sad, touching and hopeful in how she deals with daily survival and love of family while grappling with a misconnection between body and mind. I intend to follow Charlotte’s blog from now on and see how she forges ahead with finding a semblance of normalcy in her life.

I also find a parallel to my own life in how she is hoping to find an alternate solution to outright transition; love of her two daughters being paramount in her decision to refrain from doing so.
Nobody ever said life would be easy. It’s just a little bit harder when you start off at a disadvantage and having this condition confuses us for the longest time.

On another note I happened to be on YouTube last night and came upon a video of two transgender women talking about what they called “autogynephobia”! I could not help but laugh a little because it was clear that they had not done any homework at all. Here they were deriding Blanchard without even the remotest understanding of what he was theorizing about. I’m not defending the theory but there are aspects that have merit and the critique I heard was completely off the mark. We need to understand before we criticize.

Also while on YouTube I came upon Paul McCartney performing “Blackbird”. Not only is it a beautiful song but I think it fits transgender people well. To borrow a phrase from the song: “All your life you were only waiting for this moment to be free”

Comments

  1. Problem with Blanchard's theory is that it applies equally to all women (trans or not) thus every single girl who wants to be a beauty queen, wears cosmetics and pretty clothes, or asks for plastic surgery would be suffering from an alleged 'mental disorder'.
    OTOH many feminists are in denial and loathing of their femininity, so #autogynophobia has become a prevalent condition in modern society.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


indoctrination

As transgender people, organized religion hasn't really been our friend however on the other hand it has often had little to do with true spirituality. I needed to learn this over time and much of what I was taught growing up was steeped in the judgmental superstition of society instead of what some creator would demand of me.

Regardless of your belief system, you are a child of the universe and have been endowed with uniqueness and goodness of spirit. You have probably never wished anyone ill will and you have tried your best to live within the absurd coordinate system of humanity. Yet somehow belonging to the LGBT community was entirely your fault.

As I have grown older this inherent irrationality became increasingly evident to me. I knew I was a fundamentally good person and yet I was different in a way which was not of my choosing. Hence with this comprehension my self appreciation and esteem grew in proportion.

Religion for me today seems forever trapped in the misinterpretat…

let's please read carefully

This post is prompted by a recent comment I received to one of my older posts and I wanted to address it.

I used to wonder why some transgender people accepted Blanchard’s work until I think I figured out why: they may not have examined it closely enough. They would experience cross gender arousal and then accept it was Autogynephilia without properly understanding what the term meant and what the theory said: it is an invented sexual “illness” which makes people transition. In other words, it is the arousal itself which causes this desire and not a pre-existing gender identity which does not align with birth sex. Of course, Blanchard has no explanation for the origin of his proposed “illness” only that it is a form of sexual deviance.

My counter proposal? we transition despite this arousal. In other words, the transgender identity is pre-existing and the arousal is the result of the mismatching of burgeoning sexual feelings towards females and this misaligned identity; it is not per…