It all happened so slowly and fluidly that it snuck up on me.
I have been slowly but surely increasing my exposure as joanna while gaining more and more contacts and acquaintances. Accompanying all this has been a new level of comfort, security and confidence; far beyond anything I could have imagined.
As I am writing this I am waiting for my car to be serviced. At my dealer I am also known as a woman and although the car is registered under my male name I simply pretend to be my own wife when I bring the car in. These are the methods I am using to retain my female identity in the world without compromising my job situation or scandalizing the life of my children. It's allowing me to keep my sanity intact.
Life balance, life balance, life balance.
My son is currently suffering from anxiety. It's so dramatic that he feels nauseous and can't even attend his morning classes. First year of high school for some kids can be stressful. My daughter who's two years older, did not suffer the same fate. My children are both different.
I can only imagine the additional level of anxiety he would be experiencing were his father to be in the middle of a transition. I know I am doing the right thing in keeping the status quo.
Could I live comfortably and happily as a woman 24/7? I think so yes
Do I need to live 24/7 in order to be happy? No I don't think so.
Is it sometimes challenging to keep this balance going? Yes it is
Would I go back to living to a life that repressed my female side? Definitely no
So this is where I sit as spring of 2013 approaches.