Skip to main content

More thoughts on life as a part timer...

I read recently on Femulate.org about the experiences of Rhonda - a married MtF living part time who now, in a second life after retirement, is working full time as a woman. She has undergone no physical transition but she looks very passable and dresses age appropriate.

It got me thinking about how my own life has been morphing and giving breathing space to Joanna and how I trying to make that work for me as I explore this important side of myself that was suppressed for so very long.

My recent overlaps with other women have been paying off exceedingly well and it turns out that when I thought I wasn’t passing as a female I actually was. Upon discovering this I have relaxed all the more and am now passing far better. It should be noted that I define passing here as being treated and addressed gender appropriate even if you have seeded doubt in the mind of another person. But I do remember the expressions of people once they had read me when I was younger and this is now a thing of the past.

One thing that has helped enormously is my voice. It works so well that on the phone I am always addressed as Madame and my visits to stores, restaurants and to my local garage (where I am known as a woman) have been no less than stellar experiences to date. I am even now a regular at my local drugstore cosmetic counter where I was recently given an invitation to a ladies makeup evening.

I also now count a half dozen ladies who only know me as a woman and who I meet me for coffee and discussion.

So I have a life as a part time woman to the degree that I am able given my circumstances and it has been revealing and eye opening to say the least.

Here are some of the things I have learnt or confirmed that I knew anecdotally:

• Women are nicer to each other and smile more
• There is an understanding between women and less posturing between them
• Women give you the once over more than men do to each other
• Women are more open to each other and share personal thoughts much more readily (this is much like the way I already am)
• Women tend get approached more by salespeople in stores to see how they can be assisted. For example in tech stores or in hardware stores where men are in the majority as customers
• Some men are not the least bit shy about approaching a woman and complementing her or even asking her out

I must say that the last one I am the least fond of and when it happens I have been able to handle the situation with some diplomacy. I do wear a wedding ring to hopefully avoid these occurrences as much as possible.

Interesting learning and adaptation experience to say the least.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


indoctrination

As transgender people, organized religion hasn't really been our friend however on the other hand it has often had little to do with true spirituality. I needed to learn this over time and much of what I was taught growing up was steeped in the judgmental superstition of society instead of what some creator would demand of me.

Regardless of your belief system, you are a child of the universe and have been endowed with uniqueness and goodness of spirit. You have probably never wished anyone ill will and you have tried your best to live within the absurd coordinate system of humanity. Yet somehow belonging to the LGBT community was entirely your fault.

As I have grown older this inherent irrationality became increasingly evident to me. I knew I was a fundamentally good person and yet I was different in a way which was not of my choosing. Hence with this comprehension my self appreciation and esteem grew in proportion.

Religion for me today seems forever trapped in the misinterpretat…

feeling sexy

Here are the results of a recent survey of genetic women:

“A new hairdo, walking in heels and a glowing tan are among the things that make a woman feel sexy. Freshly applied lipstick, newly-shaved legs and a little black dress also have a positive effect on the psyche”

Are you surprised? I’m not because it is exactly the same list that makes transgender women feel sexy.

For a long time the idea was pandered about that transsexualism was rooted exclusively in aberrant sexuality. But of course you cannot separate the sexuality from the individual because that forms part of their overall makeup and the fact that genetic and transsexual women overlap here surprises no one.

We should also add here that women aren't always thinking about sex and neither are transgender women.

Pre transition transsexuals would not readily admit they found these things sexy because they were afraid to be seen as perverted men in front of gatekeepers who understood nothing about their condition.

Today we kn…