Skip to main content


The search for the origin of my gender disphoria now effectively over, I am focusing on my management techniques.

Joanna is a known entity. I am a divorced woman in her late forties and have a network of friends and merchants who are happy to see me and talk with me in that form. It's my pleasure to oblige them as it feeds that part of my soul that I had been trying to starve.

Many of these relationships were inadvertent. I wasn't originally trying to decieve but simply blend in but in succeeding beyond my wildest dreams, I found that I was able to tell the truth about my life and only lie about my birth gender.

By doing this I avoided the potentially awkward trans conversation that would ensue and with people who really need not know. I suppose a parallel example would be the stealth transsexual who, rightfully, decides to omit that she was born male.

Her objective is not to deceive but to live as normal life as possible in her chosen gender. In the same way, I find my approach leaves me with a rewarding experience which involves interrelating with people for whom my birth gender need not matter.

I am simply a nice lady that they enjoy speaking with or, in the example of Sabrina, an older person who can offer her some genderless life advice. I have convinced myself that this is not malignant deception but instead omission when I have crossed a bridge and it's too late to turn back in order not to have people think I have a hidden agenda.

Let's face it, I am getting a far richer experience when I am being perceived as a woman by other women. I know what it feels like when that doesn't happen and the payoff is just not nearly as rich and intimate. Women are much more themselves with other women. Men have another level of comradery but it's not as textured or profound.

Conversely, when I am asked if I am transgender or transsexual by a well intentioned person (which rarely happens I must admit) I gladly do my part for our community and act the good spokeswoman.


  1. I am always impressed with the wide range of folks who occupy the "T" universe. I think that every time someone who is "T" to any degree has an opportunity to discuss "T" issues with a civilian it is a good thing. The "one size fits all" label has no more validity in the "T" community" than it does in the marketing of pantyhose.

  2. That is very true Pat. We are definitely not one size fits all so I am happy to celebrate my own uniqueness while speaking to people about what makes us a community...

  3. After 1.5 year relationship with my boyfriend, he changed suddenly and stopped contacting me regularly, he would come up with excuses of not seeing me all the time. He stopped answering my calls and my sms and he stopped seeing me regularly. I then started catching him with different girls several times but every time he would say that he love me and that he needed some time to think about our relationship.But cannot stop thinking about him so i decided to go online and i saw so many good talk about this spell caster and i contact him and explain my problems to him.He cast a love spell for me which i use and after 2 day, my boyfriend came back to me and started contacting me regularly and we moved in together after a few months and he was more open to me than before and he started spending more time with me than his friends. We eventually got married and we now have been married happily for 3 years with a son. Ever since Dr.Kumar of helped me, my partner is very stable, faithful and closer to me than before.You can also contact this spell caster and get your relationshp fix Email: SPELLCASTTEMPLE@GMAIL.COM

  4. I am posting on this site on how a great me bring back my ex husbandr after 9 months of divorce with two kids. I love him so much,so a friend of mine clara introduced this Dr to me who also help her. he did a spell to bring him back within 24 hours, now we are together no more fight and argument. my lover now loves me more than any thing in the wolrd Thank for helping me bring back my husband to me. If you need any help like
    contact him via email: ( call +2348156885231 for help.

  5. Powerful spells LOVE, MONEY SPELL OF POWERFUL, REVENGE OF THE CURSE OF THE RAVEN, break spells, love spells work, magic spells, protection spells, Curse removal, remove negative energy, REMOVE CURSE spells, witch doctor, spiritual cleansing, OBI, healers, HEALING, HEX REMOVAL, spiritual healing, spell, wicca, witchcraft, voodoo, spells, GOOD LUCK CHARM, love spells, lucky charms, GOOD LUCK, wicca spells, voodoo dolls, LOVE SPELLS POWERFUL, rupture, crisis magic of love, traditional medicine, LOVE SPELLS THAT WORK, gay love spells, magic spells, magic spells, spells TRUE break the spell to defeat your rivals, Fertility, DIVORCE crisis, spells MARRIAGE bind us, change the spell of her LOVER, BREAKUP spell, spell WEIGHT LOSS, luck spells, healer, traditional healer, herbalist, I guess mind. Contact me today in my email. Email>
    Dr. Okaka.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"Oh please its 2016!"

I have mentioned before that I have a lovely young couple living above the unit next to mine. Well the other day as I was getting in the door, she and I overlapped for the first time with me dressed as a woman.

We had a nice conversation and at some point I mentioned the obvious which was that I had told her future husband that they might see me in a different guise from time to time so they wouldn't wonder about who the strange woman was. She just looked at me almost rolling her eyes while smiling from ear to ear and said:

"Oh Please it's 2016!"

For the record she was also very complementary regarding my choice of attire.

I could care less at this point in my life what people think but it is still lovely to see the millennial generation's freedom of spirit and acceptance so lacking in previous generations. Yes they have their own foibles, as does every generation, but this area certainly isn't one of them.

the pseudoscience behind gender dysphoria

The real science as to what causes gender dysphoria still awaits.

Harry Benjamin was on to something except he didn’t have the scientific evidence to back up his suspicions hence, like a true scientist, he negated to draw conclusions. His hunch, based on treating so many patients over his lifetime, was that one is born with a predisposition to be gender dysphoric.

However, with inconclusive brain scans and no DNA marker (as of yet) we are left with believing the word of people who need help and only want to lead happy and productive lives.

The best we have been able to muster since Benjamin's death in 1986 was to amass statistics on who gets a boner imagining themselves as a woman which is in equal parts pathetic and disappointing. For this is not really science at all but is instead playing with interview data that doesn't point to anything definitive or conclusive. I have dealt with this problem at great length in my blog.

The whole thing started with Kurt Freund's obses…

looking past cross gender arousal

Jack’s latest Crossdreamers post got me thinking about cross gender arousal and how it could be avoided; also whether it even matters. This with particular focus on the inability to relate of someone on the outside looking in.

You see, sexuality is a very complicated thing to begin with and when you then add gender identity ambiguity it becomes a recipe to really confuse someone.

So imagine that you are a little boy who identifies as a girl but then along comes puberty and short circuits everything by having the sex you identify with also be the sex you are attracted to. For in essence this is what happens to all all male to female gender dysphoric trans persons who are attracted to women.

So I ask myself: can I imagine a scenario where this inherent contradiction would not produce sexual confusion? The answer is that I cannot.

I am in the unique position, like many of you, to have experienced an early identification with the feminine become sexualized later on. This brought confusion…