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you shall overcome.,.

It's funny how my outings as Joanna have markedly improved due to the elimination of two major obstacles: lack of confidence and guilt.

When I was younger and as recently as a few months ago, one or both of these monsters would conspire to rob me of my ability to feed my disphoria in a positive way.

It was like trying to drink orange juice from a partially plugged straw thus never benefiting from the experience in a full and satisfying way. This has now dramatically changed and I can not only relax fully without worrying about what others might think but also bask in the calmness of a guilt free experience.

I know this took me many years to achieve and yet it seems so obvious in retrospect. The simple act of doing what comes natural to you has a power like no other and for the first time ever I am able to draw life from this source.

I have overcome my two worst enemies and I could not be happier for it.

Comments

  1. Joanna -

    Isn't it amazing how free you can feel when you let go of the guilt?

    There are way too many people trying to corral us into rigid standards of behavior and of presentation, many of these standards only existing to deny people freedom for implied social cohesion. Once free of worrying about what these people think, in a relatively free society, we can unshackle ourselves and be the people we want to be.

    It is so obvious in retrospect, but we had to shift so that the elements we needed to focus on were away from our blind spots. When they were in the blind spots, we filled in the images with things we knew - guilt and shame. Now, we see those things for what they are - symbols of the people we are inside, and not anything to be ashamed of.

    Isn't it nice to be able to start feeling at peace with yourself? It's a long road ahead of us as individuals, and each of us has a unique route to follow. And it's nice to feel a new kind of comfortable....

    M

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is indeed Marian it is indeed!

    ReplyDelete

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