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you get tired of caring

I get treated amazingly well everywhere I go. I do not set any limits for myself and do what I need or want to in Joanna mode.

All the while I have encountered zero problems and am addressed as a woman at every occasion. Merchants who see me on a regular basis know me and we occasionally chat about meaningless things like the weather.

I used to worry about passing but even if some people doubt what my gender is, passing is about being who you are. I am not a woman, I am myself. Even if I know I am taken to be a woman much of the time because of the questions I am asked, I no longer give that a second thought.

This is what I have strived for: to manage my dysphoria in the most normal way possible while not stressing, worrying or even caring about how I am perceived by the public.

Let people see a happy and well-adjusted person and you will be amazed at how kind and accepting they can be. I know I write a lot about gender politics here but the everyday person on the street will pleasantly surprise you time and time again.


  1. Beautiful. Absolutely wonderful affirming post. I have been hoping to see more positive posts from you as a break from your concerns with gender politics. You are the scientist so I will leave it to you to remind me of the proper scientific term for being at a good place. Is the word stasis?

  2. thanks it the word you are looking for "status"?

  3. i agree with you absolutely. I have found the exact same. The more I just be me and relax about it the brighter the day seems. Life can be good and these moments have to be fully enjoyed....

  4. It was a pleasure to read such a lovely, positive message from you. It is quite a contrast to your well-reasoned, insightful, but often angry postings. I hope that the upbeat Joanna is the real Joanna.

  5. Nice thoughts. It is something that I need to keep more in mind as of late. Thanks!

  6. LOL I hope I am not always coming off as being strident or angry. I would call it frustration at how the world works I suppose; especially over this issue.


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