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find your comfort level

Is it possible to manage gender dysphoria without transitioning? Yes I believe it is. What I have found is that there is always a possibility that you will talk yourself into progressing when you really don’t need to.

Two days ago I posted by quoting from Harry Benjamin’s work to show that he proposed whatever methods work for the individual and if dressing does it for you then that is what you should do.

I found myself in more dangerous waters when I felt bad about what I was doing and that doubt had me considering transition. It was only once I realized that I could reinvent myself in a way that responded to the level of my dysphoria that things fell into place for me. Therefore you should not be afraid to become your own creation not limited by the fickle tastes of the public. After all you need to deal with something that they don’t have.

Fearing you will disappoint others is the worst of the obstacles but once you are truly comfortable in your knowledge that this is something that needs addressing you will then be ready to reshape your life around it.

What is imperative here is to remove the restrictions in your mind that say that only women do this and only men do that. There is an awful lot of baggage we are carrying and have digested as gospel over the years. This actually makes your healing process far more difficult than it needs to be.

One of the things I have noted is how quickly some people tend move from full suppression to sudden announcement of transition without taking the time to truly reflect. This is especially dangerous for the older person who has spent a lifetime hiding who they really are.

Don’t get caught up in terminology, don’t worry about where you fall on the spectrum and just be yourself. The most important thing is to find a comfort zone. If that level ends up being transitioning then fine but at least you will have thought things all the way through before acting.


Comments

  1. Your suggestion for a thoughtful, carefully-measured response to dysphoria is brilliant. I've read too many blog-entries that seemingly advocate a head-long rush to a full transition as the only sensible approach to dysphoria.

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    1. appreciate the feedback Kati thank you!

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