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adapt and be happy

Gender dysphoria can deceive you and mine has an ebb and flow pattern that I have learnt to predict. In its most fervent moments you are sure that the best thing for you is to pursue transition and at its weakest points you question how you could ever consider such a notion. Having a grasp on how it works is important.

I know that I could live as a woman full time if I had to but the question is whether I want to. After much reflection I decided quite a while ago to put that idea aside permanently. But I can understand why many of you have decided to exercise that option and are happy you did because there is a lot to be said for resolving the dysphoria and having it subside into the background and just living.

I have gone over the many challenges I would face at this age and the drawbacks would overtake the gains. Also my dysphoria seems to be strong enough to require daily management but not strong enough to require full intervention.

If you are like me then you have already found a formula or are trying to. This is something that takes time to refine.

Most of us weigh how our actions will impact our families, friends and colleagues but at the end of the day we must be able to live as functional human beings. If I were to go back to where I used to be I could not function and it’s amazing that I was actually able to do it for so long. It took an awful toll on my psyche.

If you still doubt that this is something you caused for yourself then I suggest you try and fix it but if you cannot your best option is complete self-acceptance and to be happy. This includes telling all the important people who are close to you and getting the help you need.

You were born this way so adapt this reality into your life and be happy.

Comments

  1. Joanna, I must confess that I am confused by this sentence. "If you still doubt that this is something you caused for yourself then I suggest you try and fix it but if you cannot your best option is complete self-acceptance and to be happy." This seems completely at odds with the final sentence in your posting. Am I being singularly slow-witted? Kati

    ReplyDelete
  2. what I was trying to say is that if you still believe that being this way is a choice then do something to fix your situation otherwise accept yourself and get on with life. Maybe not the best phrased sentence Kati!

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