Skip to main content

dysphoria and sexual release

Recently I was reading a thread posted on the Susan’s Place website where the person stressed about whether they were transsexual based on the fact that immediately following masturbatory release their TS feelings seemed to subside. Of course they inevitably returned and based on the comments received this person was not unique in this manner. Many of the responses were quite interesting and very perceptive.

This issue used to worry me as well and make me think that my gender dysphoria was not real.

It turns out that all people masturbate. Some a little, some a lot, some almost never and some dressed as women or not. Some do it to fantasies imagining themselves having relations with men and/or women and some, like me, do it while imagining myself doing something very intrinsically female.

I used to try and force myself to masturbate and in those moments afterwards revel in the fact that I didn’t really have gender dysphoria and that it was all in my head. The feelings return of course and don't go away unless you transition.

Sexual feelings need to be released and for people with dysphoria it may even help relieve the stress of having this condition in the first place.

If you, like me, were unfortunate enough to grow up religious and sexually repressed, masturbating to anything meant you were doing something wrong in the first place. Having it be that much more abnormal made it worse and only encouraged me to bury the feelings that much harder.

I can laugh about this now but it was certainly no laughing matter at the time.

Comments

  1. Hi Joanna,
    At the risk of divulging TMI,you are absolutely correct when you state sexual feelings need to be released. And after release, instead of having my transexual feelings subside,the opposite effect rings true -knowing that I am a confident, sexual being.

    Best,Peggy

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree Peggy and the trick for me has been compartmentalizing the feelings and channeling them into my time as Joanna.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


my last post

This will be my last post.

When I wrote recently that this blog had another seven years of life in it I was trying to convince myself that it was true. It was in fact a little bit of self delusion.

With almost 3,000 posts to date I have accomplished what I set out to do which was to heal myself and in the process share some of the struggle I had been through with others on the chance they might find some value in my words. After seven years of writing, my life still isn't perfect; no one's is. But I have discovered a path forward completely free of the trappings which society would have had me adopt so I could fit in.

Over the last 25 years of my life I have turned over every stone I could find while exploring this topic and in the process realized that we haven't even begun to scratch the surface of this deeply complex subject. What I have ultimately learned is that my instincts have more value than what someone who isn't gender dysphoric writes about me. We are very …

feeling sexy

Here are the results of a recent survey of genetic women:

“A new hairdo, walking in heels and a glowing tan are among the things that make a woman feel sexy. Freshly applied lipstick, newly-shaved legs and a little black dress also have a positive effect on the psyche”

Are you surprised? I’m not because it is exactly the same list that makes transgender women feel sexy.

For a long time the idea was pandered about that transsexualism was rooted exclusively in aberrant sexuality. But of course you cannot separate the sexuality from the individual because that forms part of their overall makeup and the fact that genetic and transsexual women overlap here surprises no one.

We should also add here that women aren't always thinking about sex and neither are transgender women.

Pre transition transsexuals would not readily admit they found these things sexy because they were afraid to be seen as perverted men in front of gatekeepers who understood nothing about their condition.

Today we kn…