Skip to main content

how this blog has changed over time

Back in 2012 this blog started with a very personal tone. I was going through a crisis of identity and needed a vehicle to express my frustration. My making that journey public was to try and get and give feedback to others who also might be going through it.

Over time the emphasis and tone changed and it became more technical because I wanted to get into the topic and examine every crevice in order to understand myself.

I haven’t found all of the answers because we don’t possess them all but the journey has helped me immeasurably. Along the way I have found kindred spirits who have shared their struggles with gender dysphoria and how they have dealt with it in their lives.

I was given many talents and one big hurdle to overcome. Others have theirs and no one is immune from the hardships that sometimes come our way. That struggle has shaped who I am as a person, made me stronger and honed my curiosity about things more than if my life had been simpler. Of course I had a hand in making things more complicated because I refused to accept myself and if any of you still harbor this resistance I strongly urge that allow yourself the dignity to be yourself.

This blog is now about finding a balance between positive stories and videos to inspire us, sharing some of my own personal reflections and of course keeping up the technical aspects because this subject so fascinates me and we know so little still. It is also full of people trying to propagate their own myths.

I know I am mostly writing for people close to my generation because the young won't have to face the same prejudice and resistance that we did. For that I am very thankful because the world that they will grow up in will be that much more welcoming than ours was.

Having said all that, I hope you stick around for the ride.


  1. We tend to ride on the same side of the street so I will gladly come along for the ride

  2. Joanna,

    I deeply appreciate your daily writings and look forward to seeing what you have to say. Often, I am provided with something to consider that day and look forward to adding my thoughts to yours. Thank you for so much, your openness, clarity, and sincerity.


  3. I visit your blog everyday. I have learned so much since I found it. We still have a long way to go. Thank you so much for your blog.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

another coming out

Recently I had lunch with one of the young estimators who occasionally works with me here in Toronto. We were chatting about work and our respective lives when she queried about my love life:

“So how is it going on that front. Meet anyone interesting lately?”

I reflected for a moment and then said:

“My situation is a little particular and if you don’t mind I can share something about myself”

She leaned in a bit and told me to please go ahead.

“I am trans” I said matter of factly.

She looked at me and smiled and said:

“Really? That’s so neat”

She is 35 years old and a lovely person which is why I knew I could confide in her. I then added that I had been reflecting on whether I would switch companies and begin working as Joanna and although she is totally open she also knows how conservative our business can be. So I told her that if I did decide to it would definitely be under a different umbrella.

Then yesterday I was coming back to my place and the lady who rents it to me, who is abo…

feeling sexy

Here are the results of a recent survey of genetic women:

“A new hairdo, walking in heels and a glowing tan are among the things that make a woman feel sexy. Freshly applied lipstick, newly-shaved legs and a little black dress also have a positive effect on the psyche”

Are you surprised? I’m not because it is exactly the same list that makes transgender women feel sexy.

For a long time the idea was pandered about that transsexualism was rooted exclusively in aberrant sexuality. But of course you cannot separate the sexuality from the individual because that forms part of their overall makeup and the fact that genetic and transsexual women overlap here surprises no one.

We should also add here that women aren't always thinking about sex and neither are transgender women.

Pre transition transsexuals would not readily admit they found these things sexy because they were afraid to be seen as perverted men in front of gatekeepers who understood nothing about their condition.

Today we kn…

Being transgender isn't exclusively a problem of aberrant sexuality

If being transgender were exclusively a problem of aberrant sexuality, then I would seem to be an exception to the rule.

To date I have lived my life like a choir boy and have had low libido throughout. I have yet to ever see a porn film and both my ex-wife and ex-girlfriend complained about my lack of sex drive. I also knew I was different from a very young age.

This is why the accusation that male to female transgender persons attracted to women are perverts doesn’t hold much water with me. I was mortified when I hit puberty and realized that my desire to be female had taken on sexual overtones and I ended up, like most of you, repeatedly throwing things in the bin as a repudiation. In fact, accepting that my sexuality has been permanently impacted was the hardest pill to swallow in my journey to become a fully realized transgender person.

That is why I say to those who are still concerned about what outsiders who haven’t lived your personal experience have to say about you should l…