Friday, 10 June 2016

wiping the dust from our feet

The transgender issue brings out such vitriol in some people.

If we think about it, most people are motivated by wanting to be accepted and loved but also sometimes motivated by fear. Those opting for the latter, weigh in on other’s people’s experiences with their own myopic vision which is colored by their limitations.

When I was young I understood nothing about homosexuality so I parroted what I heard and assumed that it was a choice. For many years this stereotype remained with me unquestioned. As I grew older and thought about it this belief made less and less sense and it culminated in a good friend of mine admitting to me that he was gay and how he struggled with it for so long. In the end he reached a state of self-acceptance and has been very happy for many years.

My original belief had been based on bias and misinformation I had acquired and not facts.

The internet is full of polarizing opinions on the subject of being transgender and people with their own personal agendas are weighing in. Once again, many are doing so with little information and with no real intent to understand. Instead they want their version of reality promoted.

That is not the same as truth.

It is hard sometimes to read ignorant comments and it makes us realize just how much work remains to be done. But in the end we must admit that human ignorance will not be wiped out entirely despite our best efforts. The best answer to ignorance is to live a fulfilling life, full of dignity and intelligence. Instead of anger and scorn you show people that their opinions do not affect its quality.

Like the apostles before us, sometimes the best defense in places where our presence is not desired is to simply wipe the dust from our feet and move on.


3 comments:

  1. About thirty five years ago my (ex) wife and I had a couple of good friends who were gay, committed partners to each other. We went camping with them at a place called Fife's on the Russian River in Northern California that was a mecca for gay men and women. Both of them were wonderful, warm, and fun.

    While sitting around the campfire I asked them - innocently enough, I hoped - if being gay was a choice, a lifestyle. They were gracious and assured me that no, it's not, it is what it is. I guess I was a little surprised especially since so many of the people at the resort were kind of flamboyant. Sure, they were partying but was at least part of it kind of an act? I think not. We do pick up mannerisms and speech patterns from our social circles and these people had to band together in their community to gain strength in the face of preconceived notions and prejudices and fear.

    Kind of like us, maybe. But from the trans people I've met and talked with I haven't identified a common set of mannerisms or speech. In fact, the spectrum of our transgender experience seems so broad that it's hard to even establish a group. I attended a dinner last week with three transexual women and our gender therapist. I had a good enough time but on reflection I thought I'd enjoy it more to meet with trans women who are more like me, who don't have any transition plans. I communicated with the therapist afterwards to see if could direct me to such a group or facilitate setting one up, but no, she said that it's highly unlikely. I don't know why and I'm not sure I'm going to accept her answer. After all, my instinct is that there are more people "in the middle" of the distribution of transgender people without plans for HRT or GRS.

    Hmmm. I didn't intend for this to ramble on so long!

    Emma

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  2. I couldn't agree with you more. The internet can be such a fine tool for sharing information but at the same time there is so much bad information and hateful information on there. Sometimes, we as a community have to walk away like you said. Thanks for your blog.

    Michelle

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  3. Emma and michelle thank you both for your thoughtful comments. It is true that you get out of the internet what you look for and every opinion under the sun can be found. The trick is to choose wisely and do your homework on issues.

    Emma never worry about rambling on! It's all good.

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