Skip to main content

the overlap of sex and gender

Both genders are aware of which physical characteristics promote and exhibit their sexuality. Hence women know their breasts, buttocks or legs have sexual power as men also know that features such as their musculature or height can also promote their sense of being desirable. Both sexes also know an attractive face has much to do with this and hence will do what they can to accentuate the features that nature has given them.

But if you ask women why they might dress in a more sexually suggestive fashion they will tell you it’s more about making other women jealous than trying to attract men. They might also do it to attract one particular partner which makes a lot of sense because most of us are not trying to gain the attention of the general public.

Both sexes also understand how to promote their sexuality via more psychological aspects such as behavior, breeding, mannerisms and education.

Sexuality is about finding and pleasing a partner but also about pleasing oneself through self-identity and power. People can feel more sexually attractive in certain forms of clothing. Hence women understand the power of high heels or a fitted skirt and men know that certain suits or a more fitted T-shirt can bring certain traits to the forefront.

Many transgender people have attempted over their lives to be attractive in both gender roles. Their dysphoria has seen them go from investing energy into fitting into their birth sex and perhaps later making a permanent or part time change to be seen as acceptable as the opposite gender.

Part of that achievement has involved adopting dress or behavior that is generally deemed to be sexually attractive to others. My point here being that sexuality cannot be entirely unbound from gender identity because, without entirely defining it, it forms part of its basic structure.

As I have aged, the sexual energy is being depleted but the identification continues unaffected. So in a sense I am coming full circle where I am starting to resemble how I felt as a young child when the pull towards being the other gender was at its purest.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


indoctrination

As transgender people, organized religion hasn't really been our friend however on the other hand it has often had little to do with true spirituality. I needed to learn this over time and much of what I was taught growing up was steeped in the judgmental superstition of society instead of what some creator would demand of me.

Regardless of your belief system, you are a child of the universe and have been endowed with uniqueness and goodness of spirit. You have probably never wished anyone ill will and you have tried your best to live within the absurd coordinate system of humanity. Yet somehow belonging to the LGBT community was entirely your fault.

As I have grown older this inherent irrationality became increasingly evident to me. I knew I was a fundamentally good person and yet I was different in a way which was not of my choosing. Hence with this comprehension my self appreciation and esteem grew in proportion.

Religion for me today seems forever trapped in the misinterpretat…

let's please read carefully

This post is prompted by a recent comment I received to one of my older posts and I wanted to address it.

I used to wonder why some transgender people accepted Blanchard’s work until I think I figured out why: they may not have examined it closely enough. They would experience cross gender arousal and then accept it was Autogynephilia without properly understanding what the term meant and what the theory said: it is an invented sexual “illness” which makes people transition. In other words, it is the arousal itself which causes this desire and not a pre-existing gender identity which does not align with birth sex. Of course, Blanchard has no explanation for the origin of his proposed “illness” only that it is a form of sexual deviance.

My counter proposal? we transition despite this arousal. In other words, the transgender identity is pre-existing and the arousal is the result of the mismatching of burgeoning sexual feelings towards females and this misaligned identity; it is not per…