Sunday, 4 December 2016

low hum

I very much enjoyed reading 30 year old Amy’s post on her transition experience (featured by Calie yesterday on T Central) because it was brutally honest and devoid of window dressing. It was candid and chronicled both the good and bad aspects of transition in a way we don't often see.

In the end it illustrates that, for people with severe gender dysphoria, transition is not a choice but a necessity.

I used to think myself unfortunate for being on the cusp of needing to transition but not quite there; of being stuck in an uneasy middle. But like Amy has done I accept where I am on the spectrum. She doesn’t glorify the process but calls it for what it is.

A change this drastic requires courage but it is more driven, I think , by the less desireable alternative of living with the intense discomfort of having your identity not match your physicality.

I also think that a full transition is best done when young and before the ravages of a lived life and testosterone have had a full stab at you.

Amy’s life will likely involve trading one set of challenges for another but at least it will be lived without that constant low hum of dissonance that eats away at you day after day.

2 comments:

  1. It is a hum that never goes away. I was just using that word, referring to my GD, in an email to Jenny the other day. Hum, buzz, whatever....I try to keep it below the surface but it's always there.

    Thanks for the shout-out, Joanna.

    Calie xxx

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  2. You are right Calie in that it's always there and we continue to manage it. I hate to think what it would be like if my dysphoria was any worse...

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