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the shell

Third Way Trans' most recent post (which my friend Calie featured on T-Central) has a powerful message to pass on and that is that a full transition isn’t for every trans person. He is not against transition by any means only that you should be 100% certain that this is the right thing because there is no going back.

I am reminded here that we are much more than just our earthly physical bodies and yet we live in a world constrained by them which renders these types of decisions important.

A while back and after some deliberation I decided I wasn’t going to tamper with my body in any way with the only thing outstanding being the consideration of a full social transition which is also presently on tenuous ground. During my reflection process I realized that I didn’t need to do anything further to be myself and I could adopt the best aspects of each gender and mold them to suit the psychology that I formed as a young child.

Changing my body would be in some ways like trying to subscribe in reverse to the rules of society which I could follow successfully but wasn’t happy doing. Instead I decided to make my own rules and be my own kind of transgender person.

But if transition is really for you then after the proper reflection you will know it in your bones. If, on the other hand, you feel you have erred after the fact then my only counsel would be to try and take heart in the knowledge that the best of you is a mind and spirit contained in a physical body which is simply a shell that we inhabit temporarily.

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  1. In some quarters of the TG community The Third Way posting will not go down very well. HRT and a variety of surgical procedures are sacrosanct. It's their way or the highway.

    1. and that may be fine for them but the point is that it is not a universal law. His experience is his own and God knows he has a right to have it as someone who lived the full trans experience for 20 years.

  2. I applaud his desire to explore and develop all ways to help people with gender dysphoria, regardless of where I end up on the trans and transition spectrum, and I always will. I suspect that those who reject him take a "misery loves company" stand which is in some ways worse than the rejection we receive from, for example, the religious right. Come on, we're all in this transgender boat. Let's show the world that we paddle together.

  3. I remain utterly baffled and heartbroken that these ideas are not more widely accepted. Trans people are united by the need to express a "self" that is societally proscribed. To deny that self expression to anyone is merely to participate in the oppression and repression.

    I say this as someone who has transitioned as "completely" as is medically possible. As someone who could not "pass" for my birth-assigned gender if I tried. I don't need you to be like me. I already have a me I like: me. I do, however, want you to be you, whoever and whatever that is. Be fulfilled in yourself, and I will be joyful.


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