Skip to main content

Leningrad

"Victor was born
The spring of 44
And never saw
His father anymore
A child of sacrifice
A child of war
Another son who never had
A father after Leningrad
Went off to school
And learned to serve his state
Follow the rules
And drink his vodka straight
The only way to live
Was drown the hate
The Russian life was very sad
And such was life in Leningrad

I was born in 49
A cold war kid in McCarthy time
Stop 'em at the 38th parallel
Blast those yellow reds to hell
Cold war kids were hard to kill
Under their desks in an air raid drill
Haven't they heard we won the war
What do they keep on fighting for?

Victor was sent
To some red army town
Served out his time
Became a circus clown
The greatest happiness
He'd ever found
Was making Russian children glad
When children lived in leningrad.

The children lived in Levittown
Hid in the shelters underground
Til the soviets turned their ships around
Tore the Cuban missiles down
And in that bright October sun
We knew our childhood days were done
and I watched my friends go off to war
What do they keep on fighting for?

So my child and I came to this place
To meet him , eye to eye and face to face
He made my daughter laugh
When we embraced
We never knew what friends we had
Until we came to Leningrad"



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


indoctrination

As transgender people, organized religion hasn't really been our friend however on the other hand it has often had little to do with true spirituality. I needed to learn this over time and much of what I was taught growing up was steeped in the judgmental superstition of society instead of what some creator would demand of me.

Regardless of your belief system, you are a child of the universe and have been endowed with uniqueness and goodness of spirit. You have probably never wished anyone ill will and you have tried your best to live within the absurd coordinate system of humanity. Yet somehow belonging to the LGBT community was entirely your fault.

As I have grown older this inherent irrationality became increasingly evident to me. I knew I was a fundamentally good person and yet I was different in a way which was not of my choosing. Hence with this comprehension my self appreciation and esteem grew in proportion.

Religion for me today seems forever trapped in the misinterpretat…

more thoughts on cross gender arousal

I have been reflecting for many years on how cross gender arousal originates.

Firstly, the transgender child has already exhibited (or hidden) some gender variance for several years before they arrive at puberty (I wasn't older than 4 when scolded for wearing my mother's shoes). But when they hit puberty a dilemma occurs: the object of the sexual attraction is also someone whose gender they identify with either fully or partly. This contradiction affects the imprinting of the sexual identity but it is not well described as target location error but rather as a pull in two separate directions which leaves the gynephilic adolescent facing two distinct paths. I was keenly aware of this problem but wanted to be normal so I suppressed the dysphoric feelings as hard as I could. I wasn't attracted to my own image as a woman but rather to the idea of being a desirable woman as well as being with one. That juxtaposition fused to my gender core and I was left with a riddle to solve:…