We cannot see inside the mind of another person and their motivation cannot be deciphered with any certainty. Is their connection to you tinged with fear of being alone? Do they have unresolved parental issues? Is the economics part of the equation keeping the relationship viable?
We cannot understand the psychological elements that drive another person and our interplay is affected by a unique formula that we setup at the outset which can be very hard to further refine. If we sense trepidation of going too deep into their psyche, the pushback can cement us into an uneasy experience which stunts the development of a deeper connection. As a result, our relationship stays at a level of the mundane and daily experience which avoids the spiritual bond we as humans secretly crave.
In my estimation maybe 25% of relationships attain deep levels of connection with the rest hobbling along at various states of dysfunction because we are human and frail and because true intimacy requires the courage of exposing the soft underbelly of true vulnerability.
What does it mean to truly be with someone? I have no idea.