Identity is not exactly a negotiable thing but if you fall on the side of the spectrum where your alternate expression of gender is sporadic then perhaps there is room for it. If, however you fall on the side approaching transsexualism, you as the trans person are suppressing and not negotiating.
There is no road map for such a difficult situation and those transwomen who partner with men are perhaps ending up with the more desirable results. There are cases where spouses stay with their husbands even after transition, but they are a small percentage.
For me it comes down to understanding who you are and deciding how much sacrifice will be made so you can be partnered with someone else. As a trans person who leans more towards transsexualism I realized over time that negotiation was slowly killing me inside and I could do it no longer.
So, decide who you are first and then partner and not the other way around which is something I wish I had understood earlier in my life