Starting from a very young age I knew I had a problem: how to reconcile where my spirit wanted to go against where society did. My response for many years was to drown that spirit out.Social conservatives like to talk about the choice that we make to be trans as if it were an elective one but from where I sit I can attest that it has been the battle of my lifetime and, ultimately, there was no place to go other than where I am now.
Is it possible to be transsexual and not transition? Well yes because people did it for millenia as surgical and hormonal options only presented themselves at the turn of the 20th century, however many of those lives were arduous or ended in suicide.
I have made a calculated choice given my age, medical history and other corollary life issues but I know no matter which road is taken there are going to be pitfalls because life is inherently imperfect.
All that being said, there is nothing like finding yourself even if it is in that very state of imperfection.