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Day one


This is day one of putting my thoughts into a blog....I am going to be 50 years old this year and have just broken up with my significant other after 3 years together.

Life will get better again. I know that from experience but I hate feel stuck in the middle like this. I am a man but I am not normal. I am a man who dresses up as a woman and I feel its advancing. Some days I wish it would just go away and let me be. But I know it won't.

So as I ponder the future for a bit and wallow in a bit of self pity I need to simply collect my thoughts and try and let life do what it always does....resolve itself somehow and morph.....into what? I have'nt a bloody clue. If I were gay I might have resolved this by transitioning while young but having married and had children who are into their early teens and thinking this would be controllable and cureable has not made things easier.

So i thought I would include a couple of pictures this time so I can look back on it at some point. This is where I was in 2012 and this is what I thought at the time. Self indulgent I suppose...

Joanna has been getting out even more of late and doing her thing. I suppose I wanted this or thought I did but right now my mind is cloudy and confused. Let's take this one day at a time shall we? it seems to be the only way....

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love of self

If you feel you are doing something wrong it shows. Your demeanor, body language and facial expression all conspire to betray you.

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Misinterpreted religion is a big culprit in all this. These negative images of yourself came from reinforcement of stereotypes by ignorant people interpreting what is right and moral by their own barometer. You simply ingested the message and bought it as the gospel truth. Self confidence and critical thinking is the way out of your dilemma. It can…