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those subtle changes

Years and years ago when I first took my first tentative steps into the world dressed as a woman I was painfully self aware but also fascinated by what I was able to accomplish. I was actually out there dressed as my own feminine ideal - wow!! But then slowly but surely it began to morph almost imperceptibly into just feeling normal. It has been continuously doing this without fail since the beginning except that over the last few years it has gone into exponential mode. The changes have been markedly noticeable.

I know this is tied in part to self acceptance and maturing but also by my repeated forays into the world and reflecting on why I need to present as a woman. Slowly the puzzle is unraveling I feel and it is telling me that perhaps being a woman is MY normal. And while that titillating excitement is now gone it is being replaced with incredible, peace, comfort and sense of rightness that I'm having trouble ignoring. I will now be moving to the next phase of testing the novelty of it all and see whether I am indeed happier as a woman and gauge my feelings as I go. Eventually I expect to have an answer but for now I will bask in that rightness.

Comments

  1. Something to be aware of...

    http://evangelinacarters.wordpress.com/2012/09/24/transvestism-is-a-narcotic-drug/

    ReplyDelete
  2. Quiet voice you are pointing me to literature about crossdressing for erotic or sexual pleasure where I have said in my blog that I don't dress for those reasons. Otherwise I'd be one of those people who just wears women's underwear under their clothes for thrills. Or I would not be venturing out as Joanna but instead put on a tight dress and masturbate at home...thx for trying to help...

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am really not pushing for anything. I am just living day to day and seeing what happens. I am responsible and very conservative so won't jump into any rash decisions....

    ReplyDelete

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