Skip to main content foul

Apologies if my last post insulted anyone's sensibilities.

I was trying to touch on the idea of avoiding transition through more liberal gender expression for those of us who might not be full transsexuals.

I would never presume to speak for those for whom there is no choice in the matter of whether they should or should not go all the way.

At a certain point you do need to make a choice what gender you will inhibit, unless you are an artist or employed in some field where your gender presentation and it's fluidity is not an issue.

I was perhaps being a little Utopian with my ideas but indeed it is sometimes nice to dream...


  1. No harm intended. I would think that by now all of your regular readers would know that while your personal jury may still be out regarding exactly how TG you may be there is no doubt that you are a kind and gentle soul who means no harm to anyone.

  2. I agree with Pat. No offense or presumption taken. I just like to keep everybody's feet on the ground and point out, as you have, that everyone's life is different.

  3. Thank you for your vote of confidence Pat...

  4. Joanna,

    You were quite clear that what you were saying applied to only you so no one should have taken insult with it. The important thing is that you shouldn't worry about what others think and it sounds like you no longer do. That worry just leads to dysphoria. You have no problems passing, if any one has a problem with that it's their problem and not yours.


  5. Thank you lindsay. I know you take low dosage of HRT and that AQV has been full time for many many years and Pat and I cross dress so yes we are indeed different. Vive la difference!

  6. Lest anyone misunderstand, let me be clear I am not "full time", nor am I "living full time". I recovered from a rare congenital disorder a lifetime ago and I do dislike and resent the implications and associations to "full time". Unlike you, I do not "pass". I agree with both you and Lindsay tat we should all respect our differences.

    I may have qualified for the transsexual label a very long time ago for a very short period, (several months), during my recovery from what was then an exceptionally painful and arduous medical procedure. I did in fact change my primary and secondary sexual characteristics. However, you and your readers should know that I never "identified" as "trans" anything and I find that label offensive, insensitive and highly inappropriate. Forty or fifty years ago, it might have applied. Today? Not so much.

    Again, please forgive me for clarifying how I feel about who I am, and how I "identify". While I am not speaking about you specifically, I do find it tiresome that others try to "spin" my past into anything resembling what they might think that they are experiencing now.

  7. I never think of you of as anything else than a woman AQV....

  8. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

One transgender woman's take on AGP

This entry from the transhealth website dates back to 2001 and it offers a very nice dissection of the now mostly debunked but still controversial AGP theory and how this transgender woman could care two cents about it. People who have been trying to marginalize the experience of gynephilic transwomen have pushed for the stigmatizing idea that they are actually perverted men. Well this soul, who couldn't give a hoot either way, isn't buying any of it and her frankness at times had me chuckling to myself as I read her posting. If we ever met I would give her a hug for seeing through the BS but mostly for being herself: "About a year ago I was reading on Dr. Anne Lawrence’s site about a new theory of the origin of trans called “autogynephilia.” This theory asserts that many trans women—and transsexual women in particular—desire reassignment surgery because they are eroticizing the feminization of their bodies. The first thing that struck me about it, of course, was t

my last post

This will be my last blog post. When I wrote recently that this blog had another seven years of life in it I was trying to convince myself that it was true. It was in fact a little bit of self delusion. With almost 3,000 posts to date I have accomplished what I set out to do which was to heal myself and in the process share some of the struggle I had been through with others on the chance they might find some value in my words. After seven years of writing, my life still isn't perfect; no one's is. But I have discovered a path forward completely free of the trappings which society would have had me adopt so I could fit in. Over the last 25 years of my life I have turned over every stone I could find while exploring this topic and in the process realized that we haven't even begun to scratch the surface of this deeply complex subject. What I have ultimately learned is that my instincts have more value than what someone who isn't gender dysphoric writes about me. We

Never Say Never....

 I was certain that I would never post here again and yet, here I am. It’s been several years, and life has changed me yet again. I have burrowed further into my psyche to discover more internal truths about myself all in the silence of a life lived with more periods of reflective solitude than ever before. After attempting for many years to be a problem solver for others, I needed to dig deeply to discover who I was, which should be a necessity for all people and an absolute imperative for those of us who dare rub against the grain of conventional society. The most important thing we can do for ourselves is honor the internal voice which has driven us since childhood. That whisper which we were compelled to ignore through our initial indoctrination must be listened to again for guidance. I knew I had spent too long heeding messaging that wasn’t working for me as a trans person, and it was time to stop. For the world gleefully basks in a level ignorance and hypocrisy we are not abl