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out in the open

I don’t regret having spoken to the HR representative at my company. When I was seriously reflecting on the idea of transitioning, I spoke to the head of the office about how the company might deal with it. The answer that came back was the one I was expecting: that ultimately it would be my decision and that they would support me.

This was comforting to hear and I have not come back to her since we last had that very intimate discussion because the case is closed. Still I am comfortable with her knowing because I know she will continue to be discreet and because she is a very supportive person.

To her knowledge as global HR representative in a company of roughly 8,000 employees, I am the only one who came out to discuss this issue. My company has no other transgender people in it and that is not surprising since we represent a sliver of the general population.

Everyone who needs to know about me does and that includes my neighbours. Do I care what people think? Not in the least as I have passed that stage of my life now where that matters. I lived with anxiety about this for so long that I no longer care one whit. They don’t know what it’s like to be in my skin nor do they know about the challenges I have faced surrounding this issue over my lifetime.

I have found the key to treat my dysphoria effectively while remaining happy in my life as a male and that is a priceless and precious thing.

Comments

  1. I think that all of us need to find a point of equilibrium with our gender issues. A sweet spot where we can be comfortable and happy. We may not be able to do all that we want whenever we want to do it but with patience and age we sometimes pick up some wisdom.

    I think that the percentage of TG people in the general population is more than a sliver. TG folks span the spectrum from the once in a blue moon CD to the fully transitioned TS. I doubt that the math would support the fact that in a random grouping of 8000 people that you are the only one with gender issues. You may be the only one to sit and discuss your concerns with HR but just like most, if not all of your co-workers would be surprised to learn of your femme leanings there must be many others who work for your employer who have a spot somewhere on the gender spectrum. In my working life I have encountered thousands of people over the decades and I would not expect that any of them have any clue to my dressing activities.
    Just my thoughts.
    Pat

    ReplyDelete
  2. No that is true Pat. There is probably a healthy percentage of people in there who crossdress to be sure. You have picked up more than your share of wisdom along the way!

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