the outside world
I have an admission to make: I am not drawn to transgender events. No, I have never attended one and yet the very idea turns me off. Part of it may have to do with my refusal to accept who I was for so long but the other may lie in my much keener interest in blending into the rest of society. From a distance these events seem to me like a place to hide out and ghettoize ourselves.
I know some of you will vehemently disagree with me and you would be within your rights to do so but I don’t think I will ever attend one now; not when I have gotten a taste of the outside. But then it must also be said that I am a bit of a solitary bird and prefer one on one interaction.
I understand that for some people who are closeted these conventions present a chance to get out and spend some quality time but then the kitschy fashion shows and make up demonstrations grate against my sensibilities. Even if I had been born female I wouldn’t go to woman’s shows for the same reason; they are just not for me.
I once met a married crossdresser who was very much into these shows and confessed during our meeting he was a dominatrix on the side which is why I have been more careful than ever about overlapping with others who profess themselves to be transgender. This undoubtedly coloured things for me as well.
I will stick to the outside world thanks.

I know some of you will vehemently disagree with me and you would be within your rights to do so but I don’t think I will ever attend one now; not when I have gotten a taste of the outside. But then it must also be said that I am a bit of a solitary bird and prefer one on one interaction.
I understand that for some people who are closeted these conventions present a chance to get out and spend some quality time but then the kitschy fashion shows and make up demonstrations grate against my sensibilities. Even if I had been born female I wouldn’t go to woman’s shows for the same reason; they are just not for me.
I once met a married crossdresser who was very much into these shows and confessed during our meeting he was a dominatrix on the side which is why I have been more careful than ever about overlapping with others who profess themselves to be transgender. This undoubtedly coloured things for me as well.
I will stick to the outside world thanks.

We see eyelash-to-eyelash on this topic, Joanna! The only reason I attend is to present workshops and more importantly, to see old friends that I am not likely to meet out among the civilians.
ReplyDeleteIf there is anyone that is out and about its you Stana!
DeleteI feel generally the same way, Joanna, which seems to surprise some trans people I run across. i have attended trans-only groups and it kind of bores me. On the one hand, sure, I empathize. But to only be there because we're trans just isn't enough of a connection. I want to be doing something other than sitting around in a circle.
ReplyDeleteI also went out out to dinner a time or two with crossdressers. People who know they are trans, but are married, and maybe once a week they gather for dinner and socializing. This didn't do it for me either.
But I did recently attend the Gender Odyssey conference in Seattle, which was fantastic. Learned a lot, met some people, and enjoyed myself.
now that sounds more interesting Emma!
DeleteYou won’t get any disagreement from me Joanna. It could be because I am not a group type of person as, for me, I often find any group lacking in human warmth by its very nature of being a group, I guess. I had been thinking it was just me not getting this we are all sisters together thing.
ReplyDeleteYou have put it very nicely and clearly.
thanks Melissa
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