Skip to main content

my Sunday

Those who read my blog know that I don't normally write about my day to day but I will make an exception about yesterday.

I had packed a bag to go swimming but this time it would be as Joanna. My body is hairless and I have a one piece with a flared skirt that really suits me. I also recently acquired a bathing cap which would take the place of my wig. So it was now or never.

Before I could do that however a little incident happened in the morning that left me reflecting on the way we react to gender.

I was about to sit with my coffee when the chair literally gave way under me. Suddenly I had two men at either side of me asking if I was okay and helping me to stand. Had I been presenting male this would never have happened and I would have been asked if I was okay and nothing else.

Later at the pool I went inside one of the little cubicles where women change and put on my suit and cap. I left my small diamond earrings on and went to the pool area. No one gave me a second glance and I went into the lap section and did my laps.

Later in the shower area I simply rinsed off in my suit along with other women there and went back in the cubicle and changed. Uneventful but that is exactly what I wanted and I felt very comfortable the entire time.

Everything I do now as Joanna is uneventful and part of everyday life which I think is positively great.


Comments

  1. "Everything I do now as Joanna is uneventful and part of everyday life which I think is positively great."

    Bravo to you! Standing ovation!

    I feel largely the same way. I used to fret about meeting people in my "work clothes" (my old men's Levi's and a tee shirt) without makeup and appropriate women's clothing. Today, for example, I wore those Levi's, a tee shirt, and as always, a bra (my breasts are too sensitive to do otherwise), with zero makeup. (Who'd wear makeup while operating a table saw, chop saw, routers, and nail gun?) I went out to meet with a man who was cutting the cement in my driveway (long story) and later, a man came to work on my furnace system. Both were friendly, polite. The second one asked me what name I wish to use and for the remainder of his visit I was Emma.

    I can almost hear Popeye the Sailor: "I yam what I yam, and that's all what I yam."

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

how times change

How times have changed.

Whereas transition was something not to even contemplate for us, here is a young trans person who felt the opposite pressure. She looks and sounds extremely passable but decided it wasn't for her despite the social media presence of young transitioners potentially inspiring her to.

We are all different and I happen to think she's rather a smart cookie as well...


indoctrination

As transgender people, organized religion hasn't really been our friend however on the other hand it has often had little to do with true spirituality. I needed to learn this over time and much of what I was taught growing up was steeped in the judgmental superstition of society instead of what some creator would demand of me.

Regardless of your belief system, you are a child of the universe and have been endowed with uniqueness and goodness of spirit. You have probably never wished anyone ill will and you have tried your best to live within the absurd coordinate system of humanity. Yet somehow belonging to the LGBT community was entirely your fault.

As I have grown older this inherent irrationality became increasingly evident to me. I knew I was a fundamentally good person and yet I was different in a way which was not of my choosing. Hence with this comprehension my self appreciation and esteem grew in proportion.

Religion for me today seems forever trapped in the misinterpretat…

more thoughts on cross gender arousal

I have been reflecting for many years on how cross gender arousal originates.

Firstly, the transgender child has already exhibited (or hidden) some gender variance for several years before they arrive at puberty (I wasn't older than 4 when scolded for wearing my mother's shoes). But when they hit puberty a dilemma occurs: the object of the sexual attraction is also someone whose gender they identify with either fully or partly. This contradiction affects the imprinting of the sexual identity but it is not well described as target location error but rather as a pull in two separate directions which leaves the gynephilic adolescent facing two distinct paths. I was keenly aware of this problem but wanted to be normal so I suppressed the dysphoric feelings as hard as I could. I wasn't attracted to my own image as a woman but rather to the idea of being a desirable woman as well as being with one. That juxtaposition fused to my gender core and I was left with a riddle to solve:…