freeze dried

I have become convinced that our identity (including gender) becomes freeze dried during prepubescence. From there we then grow as individuals, both intellectually and in life experience, but that essential core remains unchanged.

It’s funny, I only need look at my children and they confirm this for me. Their essential characters have remained the same only they are morphing into adults with the added complexities that it entails.

What happens to us is that we are impacted by the world and that unique character is affected by the things we learn. If we are very fortunate, we will be able to understand what we should abandon and what we should swallow but the challenge is that we are too young for the level of discernment which is required. Thus, we are often left riddled with baggage to remove later.

The key is then to go back to that naked version of ourselves only with the wisdom we have picked up along the way hopefully engrained. If there is an advantage to aging it is this: an opportunity to regain an innocence which, at one time, was still untouched by a world which would not abide we play by our own rules.


  1. I just took a look at the nude version of myself in the mirror as I stepped out of the shower. I don't think I saw any wisdom in my nuggets, though. :-)

    It's true that our characters are pretty much formed before we even reach puberty. It's also true that growing up a trans child can be the heaviest of baggage. For me, it was like the baggage carousel at the airport, going round and round, but too heavy to lift each time it passed. Finally, though, it stopped coming back around, and I've been able to go on and make my connecting flight. Now, if I could just get an upgrade to first class...... :-)


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