love in the 21st century

A male friend called me last night to inform me that after a second attempt to make a relationship work, she decided to pull the plug.

It was breakup by attrition where the space between rendez-vous became increasingly wide and finally she stopped answering his texts.
Suddenly one came one day saying they had made a valiant go of it but it wasn't going to work. She strangely ended the text with an "I love you".

Perhaps it was asking too much to expect that 2 divorced people each with a child could make things work.

As bizarre as this breakup method was it didn't surprise me because love in the 21st century is increasingly spastic and erratic as well as frought with the kind of uncertainty that one had better brace for. People are strange creatures who are victims to their own baggage and the fickleness of today's world makes any commitment not worth the paper it's written on.

I told him that this was a best case scenario because he could, in his late fifties, finally focus on himself instead of the random wants of a person who isn't emotionally mature.

It is telling that our definition of love is hinged on a pick list of compatibility traits which focus on what we desire in another being while blatantly ignoring our own psychotic childhood traumas just begging to be tended to.


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