The fear of getting hurt again plus having to squeeze myself into a box to fit into someone else's idea of who I should be is what brings me to the resignation that we are probably best left to our own devices if we want to achieve a balance. Most of us have trouble in the area of romance and the added complexity we bring to the table only forces you into a tightrope scenario where a move too far in either direction sees you fall into a chasm. Hence, I cannot offer you any words of wisdom here because I cannot even help myself. I seem to have come to a place of resolution where things only work if I am alone.
These well-meaning people offering me their input don't know what it is like to be us and how much more layered and complex our lives naturally are.
For it is only the rarest of exceptions that get to have their cake and eat it too.