Skip to main content

sound and fury

I’ve been reflecting recently on some of the ideas of the great philosophers like Spinoza, Pascal and Sartre and have been featuring those short vignette videos on their thinking. Life is very confusing and religion can provide some of us with a cushion to quell our fears and give us that guarantee that St Peter will be waiting for us at the pearly gates when it’s our turn to cross over.

In truth we don’t know anything about what is going to happen to the energy that makes us who we are, and the only thing I have succeeded in doing is using logic to convince myself that there is massive intelligence behind creation. There is also a great will on the part of humankind to instill peace and harmony to our existence which seems always on the brink of some form of collapse before stepping away from the precipice.

Hence, the simplistic religious belief of my childhood has morphed into a kind of spirituality that blends my scientific education with observations on human behavior which can include great acts of altruism but also of massive ignorance and stupidity. The latter is borne out of insecurity and fear because a being devoid of these maladies will always opt for the kindness which seems to be the default programming as we arrive into this world.

Life is full of suffering and yet that infirmity leads us to places of growth. The more I witness people whose existence seems replete with misery, the more I am astounded by their resilience and level of contentment. It is like the searing pain makes us appreciate its absence all the more once we have returned to normalcy.

In Macbeth, Shakespeare writes:

“Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more. It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing”

It can seem that way sometimes but then there are also times when we will catch small glimpses of the divine and find that this is simply not the case.

Related image


Popular posts from this blog

my last post

This will be my last blog post.

When I wrote recently that this blog had another seven years of life in it I was trying to convince myself that it was true. It was in fact a little bit of self delusion.

With almost 3,000 posts to date I have accomplished what I set out to do which was to heal myself and in the process share some of the struggle I had been through with others on the chance they might find some value in my words. After seven years of writing, my life still isn't perfect; no one's is. But I have discovered a path forward completely free of the trappings which society would have had me adopt so I could fit in.

Over the last 25 years of my life I have turned over every stone I could find while exploring this topic and in the process realized that we haven't even begun to scratch the surface of this deeply complex subject. What I have ultimately learned is that my instincts have more value than what someone who isn't gender dysphoric writes about me. We are …


While this blog is most definitely over, I wanted to explain that part of the reason is that it was getting in the way of writing my next book called "Notes, Essays and Short Stories from the North" which will combine philosophy, trans issues, my observations on life, some short fiction and things that have happened to me over my life and continue to (both trans related and not).

When it is complete I will post the news here and will be happy to send you a free copy upon request in either PDF or eBook format. All I ask is that you provide me with some feedback once you're done reading it.

I'm only in the early stages so it will be a while.

Be well all of you....

sample pages...

love of self

If you feel you are doing something wrong it shows. Your demeanor, body language and facial expression all conspire to betray you.

You are a clandestine "man in a dress"; you know it and everyone else can too. Your cover has been blown. I've been there and it's frustrating. The source goes back to your self image and the notion that you are somehow a freak of nature; and perhaps you are but what of it? the only way out is to embrace yourself fully and unconditionally. I don't mean to suggest that you are perfect but just that you were created this way and you need not seek forgiveness for it. You are a creation of God.

Misinterpreted religion is a big culprit in all this. These negative images of yourself came from reinforcement of stereotypes by ignorant people interpreting what is right and moral by their own barometer. You simply ingested the message and bought it as the gospel truth. Self confidence and critical thinking is the way out of your dilemma. It can…