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finding connectedness

The single most important personal discovery of my life has been that it is possible to be trans and happy at the same time. I know that may sound odd to some of you while for others it is still an unreachable goal which eludes you. I suppose it depends where you are on your life journey.

Shedding that second skin which covers us with bias and self-disillusionment was what did it for me. I needed to remove all the trappings and start from scratch by reflecting on what worked instead of what conventional wisdom told me to do.

Here society is not going to give you good advice because it ostensibly functions like a flock of sheep. You need to understand this viscerally and find your own center which is where your internal peace will reside. The other thing you need to do is to stop looking for approval from those closest to you which includes life partners.

It is a shame that many of us entered unions where affection was conditional on our being “normal” but that is what happened to those of us who are older and did not transition. We tried to have one foot in the conventional world while finding pockets of connectedness to our nature where we could find them. I look back and realize now how much that didn’t work for me. For someone who borders on transsexualism that cannot work; not without almost superhuman effort.

Therefore, I think that figuring out what makes us tick must be achieved in a vacuum which excludes the outside world and, once you know what it is, you need to proceed accordingly and live your truth.

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love of self

If you feel you are doing something wrong it shows. Your demeanor, body language and facial expression all conspire to betray you.

You are a clandestine "man in a dress"; you know it and everyone else can too. Your cover has been blown. I've been there and it's frustrating. The source goes back to your self image and the notion that you are somehow a freak of nature; and perhaps you are but what of it? the only way out is to embrace yourself fully and unconditionally. I don't mean to suggest that you are perfect but just that you were created this way and you need not seek forgiveness for it. You are a creation of God.

Misinterpreted religion is a big culprit in all this. These negative images of yourself came from reinforcement of stereotypes by ignorant people interpreting what is right and moral by their own barometer. You simply ingested the message and bought it as the gospel truth. Self confidence and critical thinking is the way out of your dilemma. It can…