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people first

The trans brain functions on its own unique frequency. Caught between what it has ingested as education and its inclinations, there is a tug of war going on which must eventually be resolved. Coming to a baseline can certainly include transition but it need not.

The challenge we have is to dissect our thinking very carefully and pull away the thorns that have hurt us over the years without destroying everything we have built. The older one is, the more challenging this exercise becomes which is why if one is to transition it is best done when young.

I know of many cases of successful transitions late in life, but they do not come without considerable loss. It is inevitable that living a large chunk of your existence in one gender and then flipping a switch is not going to be easily digested by a society so intrinsically defined by gender.

Yes, we are people first, but the world counts gender identity among its most valued elements. It is why violence is resorted to by some when it is not respected.

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Comments

  1. "The trans brain functions on its own unique frequency."

    l so love the term frequency when referring to gender. Frequency, resonance, wavelength - these are the metaphors that help me understand and Communicate that which answers to the name of "me."

    And when people say, "Weren't you socialized as a male," l say I was socialized as a trans person. It's who I've always been. It's my natural frequency, ostensible reproductive attributes at birth be damned.

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No, I don't mind

When Halle and I last got together the woman serving us said:

"I can't wait to get home and take off my bra you know what I mean ladies?"

Arguably the statement wasn't the most elegant thing to say to perfect strangers but it made me reflect.

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There are days when the combination of the feel of my bra and forms, the pull of my dangly earrings and the feel of my feet in heels is a powerful combination which feeds my soul. I used to think this was me fooling myself until I finally admitted that my identity is being affirmed through these accoutrements. They are like badges that allow me to be addressed and treated in the manner I want; like a woman.

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