devoid of panic or urgency

I have gotten to the point where I am way past being just comfortable presenting as Joanna. The best way I can describe it is that it increasingly feels like me; like she is the person I should have always been.

Having lived so long in the male role and less than 10 years as both, I am now at a crossroads. But I don't want to jump into full time living as a woman without serious consideration given to consequences. This means primarily the impacts on my children although both seem to have given me the green light to be myself. While I ruminate I remain content because by comparison to the way i used to live before self acceptance, this is a magical time of my life. Simply recognizing you are gender dysphoric and always have been and treating it seriously has been the greatest improvement I could hope for.

That video I featured about taking things one day at a time speaks volumes about where I am today. I soak in each moment and experience and I let the lessons contained therein guide me to where I need to be.

All without panic or urgency.


  1. It is all about doing what you are comfortable with. For those of us who are "restrained" by relationships, for example, may be as dysphoric as others but are uncomfortable with altering their relationships is simply a different manifestation of the same thing, sticking with what is best for themselves - not better or worse than others. Great to hear your thoughts again.

    1. You are welcome Leann and you are not restrained you are living in a successful couple; something I don't have. Life is never perfect

    2. Restrained was in quotes because I really don't feel restrained. I simply have some limits on a part of my life that is less important that my relationship with my spouse.

    3. I think your level of dysphoria plays a huge role here. Some people must transition or perish but I am glad your life works for you.


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