Whatever time it takes

Moving about as a woman every day has become less eye opening than it used to be. I suppose it is because I have settled into my own normal and don't remark upon the differences between men and women as much as I used to.

I think that when you are confident on the inside the physical aspects become less focused on and you operate on auto-pilot that much more. You don't need to obsess on the things you used to as your gender becomes less of a concern. In that sense, I am more relaxed than I have ever been in my life.

I have mentioned here increasingly that my journey has become more internal and less about clothing or mannerisms. It has turned to the payoff of finding peace and joy as one relaxes into a life that perhaps always you suited best but you were petrified to attempt. What remain are the cobwebs of the previous life but they don't worry me as it is harder for us older trans folk to patriate our past into the present and that will take the time it needs to.


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