Gap

We are sometimes stuck in the shadows of who we were expected to be rather than who we are. This is not a hard trap to fall into and that gap can leave us feeling despondent. Such is the power of conditioning.

Leaving that manifestation behind is difficult especially if others close to us don't accept us on our own terms and the reason we sometimes need to distance from some is specifically because they can't get past their own definition of who we are rather than take us at our word.

When people come out later in life it can be daunting to those around them and remaking our image in their eyes extremely difficult. When we sense their discomfort we can lose confidence that this gap can ever be bridged.

One of my siblings is mired in religious orthodoxy and they will always look at me as someone in need of reparation rather than an example of human reality. I can't fix her mindset but only my own and my self-respect cannot hinge on her limited view of the world.

So I live my life not in hope of changing her mindset but rather in forgiving her ignorance and trying to look past it.

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