Let it go
I admit that for the longest time the archetypal self described "crossdresser" irritated me. Filming themselves on YouTube in a cocktail dress at the grocery store looking out of place didn't fit the trans narrative in my head or my own experience. But in the end I was wrong mostly because we each have our own way of expressing what is inside of us and I didn't want to play the trans echelon game. This doesn't change my understanding of the topic but allows me the looseness of knowing that once you know yourself you can let others be who they are as well.