"Long time no see Madame" she says to me and it's true I hadn't seen her for about two years; a direct result of the pandemic. I have taken recently to grabbing a bus and then the metro over lunch break to go back to haunts I used to frequent before all our lives were upended. I tell her she will be seeing me more frequently when I retire.The pandemic helped me because it sped up a process of reflection which was for years already well underway. While it cemented the idea that I would not physically transition, it also confirmed that I was much further along on the spectrum than many. The way I know many live today would kill my spirit and so I could never go back lest I fall into depression.