One last thing remains

The remaining piece of the puzzle for me are arousal patterns in trans people. Given that transsexuals typically know they are different well before puberty, what happens after to create this effect is still not perfectly understood. While Blanchard erroneously identified this as a misdirected sex drive, I think it does have something to do with sexual power.

I feel part of the answer lies in the reality that something so secretly desired but denied, becomes charged with sexual energy which once initiated becomes part of the portrait; however as symptom rather than a cause. So while AGP advocates will paint things backwards, the reality is that the identification predates the first signs of arousal patterns. Many of us were mortified at its first signs and perhaps then felt our first pangs of guilt from a behavior we had understood to be dysfunctional; all the more so if you were raised religious.

In his most recent article, Jack Molay points out that the DSM V hasn't removed AGP from its pages which has more to do with Blanchard's weight within the clinical community than the validity of his theorizing. A better approach would have simply mentioned the arousal and automatically removed its correlation to very flawed science which is being actively being used to discredit trans people; not surprisingly even by Blanchard himself.

Today, as a much less passionate observer of my own psyche, I can trace back the steps of my gender incongruity to very early childhood but still cannot piece together the formula in its entirety. All I can do is remove the symptom from the equation and ask myself if, in its absence, my identification would change.

It wouldn't.


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