Today I would be tempted to slap silly that person who walked into the hospital gender identity clinic back in 2007 begging to be repaired and apologizing for the sin of being trans. I didn't know better at the time and it's easy now with rear view mirror perspective to see that was an ill conceived position.Most trans people I have known over the years have been profusely apologetic at one time or other as if they had a severe case of lepercy. The severity of the mea culpa being directly proportional to the amount of information not divulged upon entering into a marriage. Only unfortunately, apologies are not called for here.
In the end, the degree of compromise within a couple situation rests on the degree of choice you have which is greatly determined by the axiom between expression and identity. The further to the right you are, the more the luxury of choice is removed.